Friday, 15th August 2014 - Tests, tests and more tests.

I have been happily interacting with members on Living Sober site but I feel I need to offload big time.

I have been tested to the core for the last 2 days. Firstly,  yesterday was Thursday and I had completed a "test drive" for a car brand and they had offered me a cookbook. So, I did the test  drive and yesterday instead of a cookbook - three bottles of wine were delivered. I don't know about others but my "alkie brain said yes, yes" ) bring it om! My thoughts were going haywire. What are "my options" I thought.. Option 1 was to tip it out, Option 2 was to give it away and  Option 3 - drink it. I am an impulsive person and I believe that is a product of drinking. My impulses don't normally work out well. This time it did. I asked my son if he would tip them out. He was gagging to tip them out from the time they arrived. Apparently, they were very expensive bottles of wine. I didn't want them and I phoned and complained -  hello what is wrong with me? I to them - "what if you have a drinking problem and don't want wine delivered?". The young lady counted by saying - "the research shows (listen to this - it will make you laugh) these bottles of wine should last you a "life time" I asked if she drank - Oh no only a half a glass of wine sometimes- I would drink the whole bottle in onw go and don't care it if is a $5 or $500 bottle. What is wrong with these people.


So today, 15 Aug 2014, is my mums birthday. I had plans to give her a voucher and a yummy lunch from the very expensive bakery. In the meantime, I had stopped at the bank, gone and got her a voucher and saw a lady I knew from AA. She was drunk and high and I was “her best friend ever”. Took me a while to extract myself from her grip – she is a big lady with a very firm grip!!. I then got to the carpark and we have a car key that is attached to the fob bit (the bit you can remotely lock and unlock). Well, the bloody key fell off and I spent 10 mins trying to get it out of the lock. Me being a bit stressed by this point as I am running ll\nd I know mum worries about me drinking I go to the bakery. I do a u-turn and reverse into the carpark but I accidentally bump into the car behind. Bloody f**** f**** f*** the car was full of muftil cops. I just about died. I broke out into a sweat and started to shake and thought I cannot disappoint mum on her birthday. I hadn’t been drinking but I knew that they would want to tick and cross all the boxes because of my DIC history. So embarrassed I had to wait for a “marked – car” (by this time I am wanting to crawl under the car and hide away. Marked cars create nosey people who have nothing better than gossip. Where I live, there is always someone that knows you or who you are!!. ). So I am breath testered and it came up with zero and I did what Mrs D suggested and asked to photograph the machine to post it. Oh no, you can’t do that because someone might get into the software and change it. _ I think they thought I was quite mad even asking. I am so so grateful that there was no damage to either of the cars. Just to my pride. They did point out, however, that if I had damaged the police car it would be costly. By this time I am shaking and trying to hold it together. They then announce that they will not allow me to drive for the next 12 hours. That was at 11.25am. The chap was really nice and offered to drive our car home (and I was allowed to sit in the passenger seat and not in the police car). I was so embarrassed that I got them to park the car down the street. They reiterated to me that if I got in the car and attempted to put it in the garage I would be going to court. Si, I phoned a taxi to go to mum’s and 5 mins later the police car drove passed me and then another 5 mins another police car drove passed me. I didn’t get in the car but I really want to go and pick up my girls but too bad, do sad, they can walk. It is so not worth it to lose my licence because I drove the car down the driveway. You may be wondering, why did I not let the police office drive the car down the driveway? The answer is that my son would have had a fit and rung my husband and ruined my mums birthday. I was lucky, because my son is so focused on sitting on his behind in the office with the curtains closed, he did not even notice that the car was not in the garage and I have closed the garage door.

Sorry for the long long bleat but I needed to offload. I am so so proud of myself that, for once, I could confidentially blow in the breath tester and know it was zero, gutted about my driving ability. But I am happy. Oh look almost 600 members.